clearing what you can’t see
clutter shows up in our spaces, thoughts, and interactions
“Wow, your car is so much cleaner than xyz.”
It sounds like a compliment, and I thought it was meant as one. But it wasn’t quite as straightforward as it first seemed, as the conversation continued. There’s an implication that someone else’s car was dirtier, lesser, worse. Even a compliment can be “cluttered” with comparison; the kind that slips in between the lines, carrying something beneath what sounds generous.
That’s the thing about clutter. It shows up in more places than we think. In our spaces, in our words, our thoughts, our interactions. Clutter isn’t always physical. Sometimes clutter is what we’re holding onto without realising we don’t need to.
Just like a messy space does something to the mind, it can do the same the other way around. It’s hard to think clearly as if your surroundings are asking for your attention in every direction. It’s like trying to find something in a shop where nothing is in order. Even if you can, it’s exhausting. A calm, considered space, like a well-curated room, lets you breathe. It lets you see what’s actually there.
The same is true inwardly. When thoughts are cluttered, when old grievances and unspoken things pile up, it’s harder to speak clearly, give generously, or act from a place of genuine intention. You end up reacting from the pile rather than responding from the space you could have held.
You can’t reach for anything new if your hands are still full.
— Louise Smith
Begin with your own space first. Make it a space that feels tranquil and calm, with clean surfaces and a good scent. Somewhere safe and quiet that belongs to you, so that when things are hard outside, you have somewhere to return to.
Next, notice what else can be cleared. Things you’ve been holding onto past their purposes. Problems you’ve been circling by others without addressing. People or dynamics that keep filling your space without any forms of permission. Notice what you did, how you responded, what you chose not to carry along with you. Noticing itself is also a practice on its own. Setting boundaries is its own form of tidying; it stops the clutter from building back up as quickly.
Keeping the space uncluttered is not a chore. Decluttering is a way of living, one that becomes easier to sustain over time. It’s about choosing, again and again, what deserves to take up space in your life, and what doesn’t.